Music For You

Lone

I'm actually a very lonely person.

Everyone at home goes to work. Basically, when I'm having holiday, its a bad bad thing for me because no one will be home to talk to me. You would wonder what about my friends?

Unfortunately, most of my friends are really busy. I dare not ask them out and besides, going out equates spending money. Those who are pursuing a higher qualification has been tied down to the loan. As for those who are working, I think there is no need for any elaboration.

So most of the time, I'm all alone at home. Not watching anime or whatever. I'm not a "otaku", I hope i spelled it correctly. I would watch tv, read books and play games. Sometimes, I would think of places that I can visit with my camera. For example, the KTM railway station and revisit of paya lebar and also areas around mountbatten. All that were done alone. Pretty pathetic isnt it?

I also flip the papers every friday to look for activities that I can do. I really look forward to carnival events because I can spend the whole day there unforunately, there arent any this few months. Sigh.......

So, i went to look for temporary jobs. I was working for one of the engineering company, but it lasted less than a week because I seriously dont like the way they work and I cant find anyone to communicate. After that, I continued looking for jobs and finally, I found one. I went to work in school.

I love that job because I was able to talk to people. Different people. Since its a matriculation job, I'm expected to communicate with different people. People who are even more clever than me as they were there for phd or masters. Obviously I made some friends who were also doing the same thing with me. Unfortunately, due to my self restricted mind, I was only able to open myself to one.

One was enough. I was lucky because it was a female. Most of the time, or should I say all the time, i met a friend, it will definitely be a HE. So, I find it as a big breakthrough. So we were able to communicate and we had exchanged our contacts and there was once we chatted for quite a while through apps.

Unfortunately, I dont know what happened. It seems like she is avoiding me. Didnt reply my messages. FYI, I didnt type any disgusting words to her. I just plainly talk to her as a friend like how i talked to most of my male friends. Sigh....... That made me even more sad. I mean I finally found someone that I could talk to. Its like finally if you can understand. But she chose to avoid me. I wonder will she avoid me when school reopens. If so, I think i would be disappointed. Very.

Sigh... I cant wait for school to start again. Though there are many doubts among some but I really look forward to be able to speak again....

I have been quiet for 2 months..............................

Now i wonder after i graduate, what will happen... Will I be quiet for good? Even if i found a job?........ hmmm....

posted by AhKai @ 9:58 PM